In a flash (by Cara)

Lashes fall and rise

Blurred light and noise

Confusion sets in

Pain searing through

Forced air struggling to move

Gasping

Glistening glass

Warm red pulsating out

Where am I?

I can't think

I can't feel

I can't speak

The truth is real

Reality is painful

Hurt running deeper than it's seen

Spinning out of control

Darkness comes back

Flooding inside my head

Beckoning me to stay

Asleep a little longer

Where I don't feel

Inhaling

Feeling this intense

Painful desperation

Of forced change

Emotional bliss has faded

And turned to ice

Burning flames quenched

But not inside

For within

Memories exist

Only good can stay

All the words

The faces of sadness

Have gone away

Across infinity

For you are here

Within me

I can only move on

Scared but girded up

With strength and dignity

Asking for wings

Taking flight

To be alone

Praying for wind

Under your wings

To carry you 

As you dream away

Desiring perfection

Shutting out the pain

You feel

Catching your rainbow

As I let go

Close my eyes

You're gone

In a flash

Can't comprehend

But I need only this...

Trust

For He has promised

Only good will come

Blink

Just once

Enjoy this moment

The breath you breathe in

Now

Every second

You feel

You live

Dream

But know

Life is not a game

Turning and hurling

You control

Just one thing:

Who you allow inside

To share your soul

And in an instant

Time freezes

In a flash

Gone

You will be 

Who you chose to be

Forever

Chasing Rainbows

Oh beautiful colors
So pure and bright
They move when I do
Never changing their light
I try to reach their majestic arch
Never feeling closer.
The excitement in the chase,
Refusing to give me closure.

Through glistening branches
Of freshly-rained-on green
I see the taunting faces
Of my elusive dream
Beckoning me to attain
That which I cannot win.
To strive in vain-
Spinning my resources thin.

Frustration falling on me
A heavy burden on my back
I grasp at what I long for
The ideal of what I feel I lack.
Oh beauty so lovely
How can I find thee?
A heavy sigh inwardly
"It is not for me to be."




(Written after our conversation about how I was feeling about you accepting me for who I was...the rainbow being metaphorically that image I think you want that I can never seem to achieve.)

Reprise (Hard to Leave) by Cara

I sit here,
Boxes half-packed
Belongings in piles
And my world feels like it's spinning.
I want to stop this hurt,
The lump in my throat that's rising.
Trying to find the courage to turn the page
On this past piece of life reprising.

I am afraid,
For once in my life,
Of hurting the ones I hold closest.
I can't escape this,
The next verses will be played,
Determining the level of my commitment,
Causing pain for ones so loved,
Leaving unplayed songs of resentment.

Some plant doubt,
Others push me along, encouraging.
Calloused from playing the same sad songs
But scared to try new notes,
I fumble to write it out,
The part where I stop running and hiding,
Wishing I could flip the pages forward,
Past the parts where I spend hours crying.

I know I will step
Out into the unknown world,
I will face my fears and turn the page,
Begin again, and still revisit those old notes.
I will write a new piece of my life,
Let Him lead the song and incorporate what was missing.
He will heal and comfort the aches
Of losing what I know and those I won't be kissing.

I never knew
Leaving would be so hard
I'm so loved and welcomed home
To the arms of the one I'll spend life with.
But I wish I could take back the events
That caused heartache to ripple unendingly,
To stop my little ones hearts breaking
To keep them near and whole eternally....

Sacred Heart (by Cara)

Burrowing inside
The chasm in your chest
Heart pounding
Restless. Awakening.
Once desecrated,
The spark again ignites.

Warming to the glow
Enchanted ever more
Bewildered by sudden movement
But graceful in acceptance
Patience.
Patience joins this time
To eternity.

An obscure prayer
For thine heart
As it melts and molds to mine
To protect
So frail this bud
And yet rooted strong

Ever changing
Consecrating, each other
God our witness
In testament in faith
He reaches down
And cradles
Life

As children walk blindly in faith
We run with hearts abandoned
Towards One who carries us,
The healer of past,
Faithful in present,
Promising of future,
And collide.

Bound but free
Scars covered in cleansing blood
I find you
Patiently waiting
For we share
This heart
Till eternity