Reprise (Hard to Leave) by Cara

I sit here,
Boxes half-packed
Belongings in piles
And my world feels like it's spinning.
I want to stop this hurt,
The lump in my throat that's rising.
Trying to find the courage to turn the page
On this past piece of life reprising.

I am afraid,
For once in my life,
Of hurting the ones I hold closest.
I can't escape this,
The next verses will be played,
Determining the level of my commitment,
Causing pain for ones so loved,
Leaving unplayed songs of resentment.

Some plant doubt,
Others push me along, encouraging.
Calloused from playing the same sad songs
But scared to try new notes,
I fumble to write it out,
The part where I stop running and hiding,
Wishing I could flip the pages forward,
Past the parts where I spend hours crying.

I know I will step
Out into the unknown world,
I will face my fears and turn the page,
Begin again, and still revisit those old notes.
I will write a new piece of my life,
Let Him lead the song and incorporate what was missing.
He will heal and comfort the aches
Of losing what I know and those I won't be kissing.

I never knew
Leaving would be so hard
I'm so loved and welcomed home
To the arms of the one I'll spend life with.
But I wish I could take back the events
That caused heartache to ripple unendingly,
To stop my little ones hearts breaking
To keep them near and whole eternally....